Not a competition..

Almost six years ago I began a journey no one could have prepared me for...Being a mom! A wonderful but hard job that I would never give up! God has blessed me with two wonderful children who right now are 2 1/2 and almost 6. Not the easiest of ages but I really am enjoying watching them grow and explore life. I have to say though I would not be the mom I am without all of my other mommy friends out there to turn to. Not just the moms who are my age..mom's that I turn to of all ages who either have little ones themselves right now or those who have raised them and they are now living on their own.

What I love about my friends is that we all love and are there for each other no matter what. Through the smiles and the tears b/c lets face it parenting is not just all about the joy. We might not all parent the same or even live life the same but we all have our kids best interest at heart. I have friends who were able to breastfeed and did so till they were comfortable, I have friends who could not or were not comfortable. I have some friends that let their children "cry it out" and others who chose not to. I have friends who put their kids in nursery school starting at 2 1/2 and I have others that waited till a year before Kindergarten and friends that home-school. Guess what, NO ONE has all the answers and no one does everything the same way. We are our OWN child's parent and as long as you are comfortable doing what you do it is not up to anyone else to make us feel guilty or as though our parenting style is wrong. If you want to put your child in time out or take away toys as a form of discipline then guess what, you do what works for your child. None of us are made a like so what makes us think our children would be. I have two kids, a boy and a girl and they couldn't be more different. They have very strong personalities but they respond to discipline differently. My daughter understands time out while my son has to get something he loves taken away. This is just what works for us. I only answer to God, not anyone else.

I'm thankful for the other mommy's/friends in my life that I correspond with and get wisdom from. There are many of you and you know who you are ;-) We don't have to go through the tough moments alone. Only we understand "Mommy brain" or the exhaustion that comes from bringing home a newborn, or dealing with the terrible 2's & 3's .

I also find that sometimes people think life is a competition between their children. One thing I will never announce is my child's grades. I will simply state they did well or that I'm happy with their report cards (if that) but publicly that is all you will get. If they do great they will know I'm proud and if they try their hardest and don't do so well then I will still let them know I'm proud. There is so much pressure on kids today that the last thing they need is for us to add to it. I'm not talking about encouraging our child to do their best, I'm talking about making them feel like they aren't good enough for not getting A's. I've seen all too well what can come of parents that do that. Even when I was in H.S. I saw what those pressures did to people around me. If you think about it, when was the last time someone asked you your GPA in high school or college (and I don't mean those who are applying to schools) No one cares that I got B's in high school. I tried my best and had a great time in high school/college. I have a lot of fond memories that can never be taken away. You cannot get those days back. My mom never once made me feel bad for bring home a B. If I needed extra help in a subject she made sure I got it but never ever made me feel bad for not getting straight A's. Thank you mom for that..means more then you ever realized!!

I simply write this b/c it doesn't matter if your child walks before mine, or if yours talks before mine, or if yours can hit a home run before mine. I will be excited for such accomplishments no matter who does it when. I LOVE the support I have all around me. I don't even have all my close friends in the same state as me but they are a quick, call, email or FB chat away. I love that I don't get judged but rather given great advice when I'm not sure what to do. Parenting is hard enough without others making it harder. No child is perfect..some people might think theirs are but the reality is, there is no such thing! I hope if you are a parent reading this that you have a great support around you and if not I'd love to get to know you more. Life is so short, enjoy the moments you have with your children and know there is someone out there if you need to talk :-)

Love and prayers to you all,
Darea ...One Blessed Mommy!